24 ta life....

I've been on WW now for 24 weeks and I can easily say this is the worst week I've had "on plan". The reason I'm putting "on plan" in speech marks is because I can't actually say I've been on plan this week. In fact, I have most definitely been off plan this week and kidding myself that I have been anything else.

I don't know what the problem has been this week. Saturdays, I always have a points free day. I eat what I like and I don't worry about it. Especially now as I've found that what I eat has drastically reduced in size from what I ate before. But I think it all kicked off this Saturday.

I went out for lunch as normal, and left most of my lunch because I was just so full. I can't remember what I ate for dinner, but I drank that night and had some "munchies" a;ong with it.

Sunday I was lying in bed thinking "I could really go something tasty and stodgy for breakfast...toast with loads of butter, roll on sausage...all washed down with a delicious capuccinno" and just then my friend texted me to see if I wanted to go out for lunch (yes, I was still in bed at lunchtime). I wasn't going to go, but the lure of the capuccinno was too much so I quickly jumped out of bed, showered and got ready to go out. I knew where we were going and my pre-WW usual there was a massive cheese toastie with vegetable soup. I'll just get the vegetable soup I told myself. Vegetable soup and a capuccinno. Or toast and a capuccinno. But when I got there I ordered my old faithful - the huge cheese toastie, with the soup. And when they brought the soup they brough an additional extra that I never used to get - crusty bread with real butter. I wasn't going to eat it. But I did.

I went the rest of Sunday not having much, but then decided to have a drink at night. I can't remember (not coz I was drunk but coz I wasn't counting points) if I had anything to munch with it.

From there on in the week has just spiralled - chocolate biscuits, rolls on sausage, full fat crisps, burgers, cheese. It's all just gone wrong. I can't believe I've let myself do this. I don't know why I did it. And it's pissing me off that I did do it!

I'm sure this week of overindulgence will lead to a gain on the scales tomorrow, and I have no one to blame but myself. I just hope its not too much, but as I sit here with two (yes, TWO) burgers and a lemon sweetie bar in my belly, I'm not holding out much hope.

We'll see how I get on in ten hours.

Quick post

Well all this week I have really, really struggled staying on plan. Last Saturday I deliberately rammed a shitload of fatty, unhealthy food down my throat even though I didn't really want it, and the rest of the week was no different. I've generally been crabby, work has been crap, I was fed up, I didn't track, I've not been to the gym and even though I tried to stay on plan but when it came to it, I don't know how many days I did. It's the first week I've really thought to myself "what's the point?".

When I went to WI this morning I was fed up. I was expecting to STS or even have put on. I got there late so I had to wait ages to get weighed. I was getting more and more pissed off standing in the queue and going over in my head why I was doing this and what I am trying to achieve, but generally just reiterating to myself that I didn't see the point. So finally (30 minutes later) it was my turn to get weighed and you can imagine my surprise when I dropped 3lbs! I honestly couldn't believe it. I was 1lb away from hitting my 2 stone off, and didn't expect to do it, and there I was - over it! 30lbs down. 30lbs!! Not only is that now 2 stone off it's also 15% off!

It was just the little boost I needed. Now I see why I am doing this. And I will remember the feeling when she told me I had dropped 3lbs this week. And that will spur me on through difficult weeks in the future

A first for me...

Today I am feeling pretty down about the whole WW thing. I'm not even thinking about giving up, but this is the first time I've felt like this. I'm not fed up with the plan, what I am fed up with is that I feel like I've been working really hard on this. I've been sticking to plan, I've been exercising anf going to the gym. I've made a point of not putting myself in situations where I'll be tempted to go off the rails and when I've been in social situations where I can't control what is served, I've made smart choices and what to and not to eat. Yet I'm feeling - where's the progress? I've lost 24.5lbs. That's 1 stone 10.5 lbs but I don't see it. I don't feel it. I just went to the shops and picked up a load of stuff to try on. Some in my normal size (UK size 20) which I was when I joined WW and a couple in an 18 as I can away with that sometimes. None of the 18s fitted. None of them. So how much freaking weight do I have to lose to drop a dress size?! It doesn't help that yesterday (when I actually didn'y feel like this) I went WAY over points so I'll spend the whole bloody week clawing them back. I'm not in a happy space today and hope that this will pass soon!