Hmph

So I thought the heavy feeling that was weighing me down was sadness. Turns out it wasn't. Turns out it was FAT. Three additional pounds of fat! I am so pissed off, confused and unhappy. I've never gained 3lbs in one week before (I did once, but I'd drank a ridiculous amount of water that day, not peed before weigh in and weighed in at night after 3 meals and not first thing. I also lost that 3lbs, and more, by the time I weighed back in normally four days later).

I said I wouldn't be surprised with a gain this week, but I meant 1lb max. I didn't overeat. I ate out, but felt I made good choices (Lentil soup, roast chicken no skin and a baked potato). I just don't understand it.

I'm just fed up in general at the moment and this hasn't helped. It's wiped out the last two weeks losses and my mini goals. I could actually cry, I'm so sad and angry and annoyed. Grrr.

The number that I can't hit...

Three is apparently the magic number. But not for me. I've been hovering around the almost-lost-three-stone mark for so long now. Last week I had 1lb to drop. So easy, so doable. I went to the gym way more than normal. I thought I ate well. I stood on the scale. And I put on a 1lb. So now, I'm 2lbs away from my next Silver 7 and I'll be honest, I might as well be 2 stone away from it. That's how far it seems.

This week will be hard as I'm away with work so basically will be served food I have to eat - no choices. Gulp.

Sad face :(

Okay, so it's only Monday teatime and I'm already pissed off with ProPoints. Bearing in mind I don't point on a Saturday that means 1.5 days of the plan and I'm already pissed off with it.

Seriously, I AM HUNGRY. I was never hungry on the Discover plan. I am so far finding it a nightmare to follow. Yesterday I used 8pp of my weekly allowance, and I wouldn't say I ate any more than I do on a normal Sunday (I generally don't eat much on a Sunday between getting up late and then being really busy) and I was still hungry when I went to bed.

Today I had 2 cereal bars, 2 coffees, a small lentil soup and a white roll with crisps and I only have 8pp left for dinner. And let's face it, 8pp gets you sweet FA.

I'm going to try it for the rest of the week to see how I get on, but I can seriously see me going back to the Discover plan.

:(

Ch-ch-ch-chaaanges

So when I went along to my meeting on Saturday, I got my fancy schmancy new ProPoints book. According to the Leader "everything" we need to know would be in the book and she even brought in a days worth of her food (it was gross, it had been sitting all week!) to show just how much you can eat in a day. I planned to sit down and go through all the stuff on Saturday so that when I went shopping on Sunday I could have pre-planned all my meals so that I knew where I was at. I had a terrible week last week and I am blaming it on how I was stupidly feeling about the new plan. Scared it wouldn't work so sabotaging myself. Anyway, it didn't quite work out like that.

I did have a quick read of the stuff on Saturday. None of the science behind it, but the general info about foodstuffs and what the points allowances were. You basically now are allocated a daily and a weekly points allowance. My daily allowance is 29 and my weekly is 49 (everyone's weekly allowance is the same). You can no longer "save" points for treats etc, that's what your weekly allowance is for. The points value of all foods have changed - mostly increased. Fruit is now zero points, but other things, such as baked potatoes have leaped (10-14 points without filling I've heard - glad I don't bother with them!). I also know one of my staples (and yes this is probably why now they're trying to promote healthy eating) Weight Watchers oven chips have leapt from 4pts for 240g to 12pts!

First of all, I am on the minimum daily allowance of 29. Now, being that I haven't read the "science" behind it, it may well be explained in there, but my first impression is "I have at least three stone still to lose, possibly five, so how can I possibly be on the lowest points allowance?". Straight off the bat - without having to read any "science" - on the old plan I could see that as I lost weight, my points allowance reduced therefore allowing me to continue to lose weight at a healthy rate. I cannot see how I can have the same points allowance as some 8 stone chick looking to lose a bit of weight for Christmas / Wedding / Holidays. BUT like I say, I've not read the whole science shit so it might well be explained in there.


Secondly all over the website people are complaining about not being able to eat their 29 points a day. I don't think I'm going to have that issue. Today I had toast and coffee for breakfast, soup and a roll for lunch, a packet of crisps and a coffee for a snack and a small tin of Mac cheese with toast for dinner and I'm over points already. On the Discover plan I can guarantee I'd have had points left over on that.

Thirdly there doesn't seem to be much hard and fast information available - apparently food stuffs are still wrong on the tracker and on the website some people are saying you should be eating all of your daily points, and whatever you want of your weekly, some people are saying you should eat most of your daily points and some of your weekly and others are saying you should eat all of your daily points and all of your weekly! WTF Weight Watchers, get some frickin' FAQs up on your site!

Like I say, I planned to plan out my meals for the week and stick to them as best I could however on Sunday I was ill so I didn't get to the supermarket and had to rely on my fiance to get my food in. My head was all over the place so I just told him to get some of my old Discover Plan staples so I'm just having to muddle through as best I can.

Overall my first impressions of the plan aren't favourable, but I really want to like it. I like that they're trying to encourage you to choose foods that are good for you rather than foods that are convenient / low points, however I do think they will lose people in their droves. It's much harder now to pick up something in the supermarket and know whether its going to be something you'd want to include in your diet - on the Discover plan you knew if something was high in calories and/or high in sat fats it would also be high in points. Hell, sometimes from experience you could guess the points! There ain't no chance of that with their carb/fibre/fat/protein combo!

I don't think this week will go particularly well for me, due to the lack of planning but I'm not going to give up on it right away. I will give it a week or two, although I was really hoping to be in the 10s by 1st January although that looks hugely unlikely now.

Uh-oh

I've had a bad week this week. Totally my own fault and no one else to blame.

Yesterday I had a big work day out which had been arranged for a few weeks. It basically involved eating loads and drinking. Because I knew it was coming up I planned to a) weigh in early (on Thursday rather than today, Saturday), b) save a couple of points a day so that any damage wasn't as bad as it might've been and c) make healthy choices. Just because I'm booked into restaurants for lunch and dinner doesn't mean I have to go crazy and have eat really bad food. Unfortunately I did none of this.

All week I've eaten like crap. I've had pies, chips, chocolate, alcohol and I've not set foot inside the gym. I kidded myself by saying "oh it's this new ProPoints system. I've not had it rolled out yet but all the stuff online has changed so I don't know how to work the points out!". This was shit. LIES! I basically wanted to eat what I wanted without thinking about it. By the time Thursday came around I knew I'd have gained anyway so I thought fuck it and just went shopping instead.

When I went out yesterday I did pace myself as far as alcohol is concerned. I am pretty much a lightweight and if I drank the way everyone else did I probably would've blacked out/passed out/spewed (or all three!) but the thing is I spaced the drinks out with Pepsi and not water. I drank cocktails, I ate chips and cheese and other fatty things and then I moved onto cider.

I was SO tempted to skip WI this morning, but they've launched the new Propoints plan and it was being rolled out this morning so I had to go to get my pack. I prepated myself that I was going to have a gain and I didn't think I was bothered. But I got there and stood on the scales as I was so disappointed when I saw it was worst than I feared. I put on 1.5lbs. I know 1.5lbs doesn't seem like much, but if I dropped 1.5lbs I'd be delighed. It's a huge amount to me, especially as my weight loss has been so good the last couple of weeks. I've been doing WW for about 28, 29 weeks now, and I haven't had a gain in 17 weeks and the most I've ever gained before 1lb *siiiiiiiiiiiiigh*

Oh well. Like I say, no one to blame but myself and only I can put it right, which is exactly what I plan to do. I am away from home next week for two days, but plan to be prepared for the whole thing (the only thing I won't be able to control is the dinner on the Thursday night but I can control how much of it I eat). This week will be my first week on ProPoints so I will give some thoughts on it next week but the good thing is it makes it easier for me to grab some food on the go/take food with me as fruit is now all 0pts. My suitcase will be full of apples and oranges!

In other news, I tried on my size 16 jeans this week and they fit nicely which was a huge boost, but I also tried on my size 16 Anthro dress and I am still miles away from getting into it. Maybe summertime!

And for about a year, maybe longer, I have loved loved LOVED Dannii Minogue's chic and shiny bob. I always said I would get it when I lost weight (waaay before I even thought about joining WW, and not really believing I would ever lose weight). I hate my hair. I've always had fine hair, but I used to have lots of it. To the point I'd asked for updos and other styles and been told on more than one occasion by more than one hairdresser that I had "too much" hair for that particular style. Over the past few years my hair has got thinner and thinner and it upsets me SO much. I've cried about it. I went to the Docs recently to see if he could find any cause, but they can't. It's just "one of those things" and "it might right itself" and "good hairdressing should hide it". *Sigh*. So I've been growing it for years but it looked awful so I decided, well I've lost weight, I've loved this hairstyle, maybe getting it chopped off will help the condition and maybe stimulate the growth again.

I have to say my hairdresser did a fantastic job. She did exactly what I ask for and it's not her fault I feel this way, but here's what I went in and asked for:



And here's what I think I look like with it:



Now don't get me wrong, I think Ruth Jones is a great looking woman. But not as Ness.

I'm really disappointed with it, but it's because I've completely overthought it. I think in my head I'd come out with the new hair cut LOOKING like Dannii haha. I mean, no way, it's a haircut not bloody plastic surgery! But anyhoo, I was hoping it'd be a confidence boost, but it's not. I hate it and with my shitastic hair it will take FOREVER to grow. Meh.

Sorry for the Debbie Downer post but it's just the kinda mood I'm in.